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GET IN THE VAN!

I am taking you on a tour.

Finally. #amiright

If there is anyone left on the Interwebs who doesn’t know me allow me to introduce myself. My name is Leonard. I am an 8-year-old mini panther and I am beyond AMAZING. #obvs

I am an incredibly cool street cat who was a leader of an East Van cat gang.
Original gangster styles. #ahem
Yes.
I have O.G. status. #iamfamousintheseparts

I am not gonna lie to you.

I have seen it all.
A lot of shit went down while I was out there.
I am an alpha male and I am incredibly sexy, and all the other cats were always up in my whiskers.

But I survived, kicked some ass, made some friends, met some ladycats, and now I live a life of luxury in “her” house.
I also play bass in a band called Apocalypse Meow.
You have probably heard of us.
We rule.

I am doing this tour because I took a lot of lessons with me from my bad ass O.G. days.

I know things.

Big important LIFE CHANGING things that I want to share with you.

Life lessons if you will.

Such as:

  • No matter how hurt you have been you have to learn to receive love. Everyone loves me and I receive it really well. So can you.
  • Want what you want.
  • Scars are sexy. DAMN sexy.
  • You gotta do what you gotta do to get where you want to go and there is NO shame in that. #catstairs
  • Look after yourself because it ups your energy, your sex appeal, and your life and you are worth it.
  • Speak up and let your voice be heard. Example: I sing like an angel. I am as good as Leonard Cohen who was named after me.
  • Have a really good back up band that lets you shine and vice versa. #morecowbell
  • Stand strong around what you value and take up space.

When you know all these and the why’s behind them you will be—almost—as rad as I am.

We all know cats are the coolest creatures on the planet and we openly run the world.
OWNING these life lessons is why we are able to control EVERYTHING effortlessly.

Don’t try to resist me.
It’s impossible to do because I am THAT WISE and THAT AMAZING.
Again, #obvs


Choose your price:



Now the deets:

When:

September 4- 13th, 2017

Where:
Online, live from my fur blanket to yours.
Emails once a day to your litterbox and a FB group to chase meece in and discuss how much it rocks to get email from a rockstar cat like me. #irule

We will also discuss how amazing these life lessons are and how they will change you.

How much:

$10.00, $25.00 or $50.00, and here is why.

“She” tends to yammer on about weird things like “bills” or “rent” but unless she is discussing how magical I am I really try to tune her out.

I mean she can be incredibly boring. Again, #amiright

But we gotta live somewhere and until my band gets a new lead guitarist and I can get my own pad then this is my kingdom.

$5.00 of each tour spot purchased is going to VOKRA cause those rad babes helped me retire from the street gang and embrace my life of rock ‘n roll and pure luxury.

Rescuing cats is as rock ‘n roll as it gets but let’s be honest. We ALL know that cats really rescue people. #alittletipfrometoyou

Sooooo, are you ready to rock?




Get in the van and let’s have some REAL fun.
Like, way more fun than her other tours.
#sheissolame

All the cats who adopted you are welcome.
They can plan the late night hot tub parties and mix drinks cause I will be super busy writing. #respect

Dogs too. I ran with a few cool dogs back in the day and they are awesome back up.
They can roadie because I don’t do any heavy lifting. Clearly. #arthriticcathips

Peace out!

Leonard

lenny

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